The Letter

Way back in high school, around five years ago, our English teacher asked us to write a letter for our father. I kept my scratch letter and this is what was written on it: (sorry for the wrong grammars and misused words; I copied exactly what was written on the scratch *wink*)

Letter written for my one and only dearly loved papa,

How's life? Four years had already passed but, still, I am the "little" lass you left, singing songs you like and inspired by you, and grooving in the dance floor just how you taught me to...

So many words let unspoken - the reason why I snatched this opportunity. I know you know that I am the type of girl who was not able to practice that "openness" they call, but of course, I am sure of myself that all the things I do are not against you and mama or anyone else.. all guided by your teachings, so as God's (though sometimes I really commit mistakes). Back to that "openness" topic, because I am not fond of doing that, I just want you to know that I miss you so much, more than you ever know. And there are these things that sometimes plays on my  mind... like maybe if you are here, I am happier (because you are one of the jocular person I know)... maybe I could have more extra money (hehe!!)... maybe by now, you're helping me in our research project... strange right?! but they're pure.  I am happy 'coz you'll be here this coming March. I know graduation day is very special for you and it is obvious!! You know why?! Because every time you will text me, you always stat these, "aakyat ako ng stage pag-uwi ko (when I go home, I'll climb up the stage)". Frankly, I am really pressured that sometimes I do get tired. But it does not mean that I am giving up, evidently, I am giving the best that I can to fulfill your dreams. Please... do not expect that much, though i cannot say this, I know that deep inside you feel the way that I fail, that is why you always cheer me up saying "kayang kaya mo yan! (You can do it!!)".

I want you to know that I can really say to all of my friends or even yell to everyone that I am the luckiest daughter for I have you as my father. you give us a lot of love and care, doing all the sacrifices you could give just to satisfy our needs, you do not smoke, you do not drink, you are a religious person, talented, you respect mama more than you respect other woman, you love your parents so much... and the last of all, YOU LOVE ME - a love that no one can give but you. *sigh*

Sometimes, I know I hurt you and I am sorry for those things. I was not able to follow your words, sorry. U was not able to reach your expectations, sorry. I cannot say all these things, SORRY.

From all the trials we have been through, I know by now, our family have gained a peculiar quality no one could steal from me. I tell you... all the difficulties that are still on your way, we could pass through them especially now that I have already seen God who keep us and protect us. We can do this!

Take care of yourself always. Keep in touch with me... with God. And remember,

THERE'S ALWAYS A DAYE THAT FOLLOWS AFTER DARK.

Happy Birthday!