Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Replies

(This happened month of May, 2012.)

I was talking to a friend when she asked me how my life goes. She actually wanted to know the latest story between me and this someone... I told my friend we're okay. I am okay. But she won't let me change the topic. For an hour, I think, she kept on forcing me to tell her a story about us. So I ended up summarizing a story in five text messages:

",hahaha. hmm. ganto kasi. nung nagapply kami sa A****** ni *****, katext pa namin si **** **** nun. nasa ** siya nun, dun sa ** niya. yun yung last time na nagkatext kamil."

"kinabukasan nung araw na yun, nadiscover kong nakablock ako ulit sa fb ni **** **** pero di parin naman kami friends pero naunblock na niya ko dati pa."

"hmm di ko siya tinetext pag magkasama sila kasi nga parang di ako ok dun sa gf niya (basis ko e yung pambblock niya sakin the first time) so naghihintay nalang ako na siya unang magtext, but he never did na."

"so nasisip ko na baka nga nakakagulo talaga ako sa relationship nila kaya ganun. sakin, ok lang naman. i want what's best for them and if eliminating me is a part of it, then let it be."

"you know naman na wala akong any bad intentions for them diba? alam mo din that i really enjoy making friends at yun lang ang habol ko. it breaks me to realize that am facing my greatest fear right now but i don't wanna be selfish. kung sa gantong paraan ako makakatulong, bukod sa pagbigay ko ng mga payo before, then i'd rather be happy than broke :) "


Saturday, June 2, 2012

Am Hoping

Hmm.. today, me and my closest friend had a very good time together. I held her camera and browsed some pictures, old and new. These pictures brought me to the summit of my emotions.

Happiness and sadness. That was weird but I felt both at the same time while gazing at the colorful screen. I was laughing but deep inside I am drowned in tears. I was so noisy but my heart chose to rest in quietness. I was full of energy but my mind was really fatigued.

Yes, I was wearing a mask but my friend knows what's behind it. I cannot hide it from her. It surprised me when she uttered "why are you sad?" for even I never realized I looked that way. Why?

The pictures were in motion. Some tickled me while others slapped me. Some also hypnotized me and brought me to thousands of places where I went, millions of feelings I felt and countless people I met.

I miss them.

Different stories echoed in my mind. It's like... a strong wind blew and the pages of my life were scattered on the floor. Slowly, I picked each page and the highlighted lines were read. While compiling the pages, I saw pieces of a puzzle. I tried putting them together but I cannot. Then I realized these are my unfinished stories - stories which left me hanging in the air. Stories which have periods at the end....including the hooks above them.

The latest story? The untold one. The kept emotions. The unsaid words.