I am confused.
I know I should not, but I can still see myself standing where I am not supposed to.
How can I have the courage to take a step when all I wanted is to be where I am right now?
How can I have the courage to let go of the hands that fills the spaces between my fingers, filling the spaces of my life too?
How can I have the courage to open up my heart and let you understand everything when I know that after doing such things, you will change and nothing will remain?
Everyday I suffer from the pain I have inside.
Caused by these words left unspoken and actions left undone.
But if I think more about it, I would still choose to suffer...
than to see you walk away.
To my heart I am sorry.
I once promised I will take care of you and keep you away from people who might hurt you.
But now it is me who puts you into agony and pain and suffering.
Do not worry, I know this pain is temporary.
If I already found the door that leads to betterness and if I already have the courage to open it,
you will be stronger and happier.
There are no regrets.
There are no mistakes.
All these are worth it.
Let's just wait. And wait. And wait.
For now, let's just smile. And cry. And smile.
To you, I love you. And I am sorry for loving you.
You are the person I could never afford to lose.
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